Mojo's Media

Another Public Service Thanks to Your Awesome Internet Chum Mojo

What's that, you say, young Mojo fan? Your horrifically cruel English teacher is making you read Steinbeck? Yeah, he's a light-hearted load of laffs, that one! Just GREAT to read when you're an angst-ridden teen wondering if life is indeed worth living. (Spoiler alert: It generally IS, although there WILL be some sucky spots.)

To help you in your quest to at least APPEAR to be well-read and intellectual 'n' stuff, I offer you this VIDEO study guide of Steinbeck's THE RED PONY. No need to thank me profusely; just pay it forward...

Mojo

 

Mojo Offers You PROOF.

FredGranted, Mojo complains about so many petty things it is easy to just kinda tune her out and ignore her many LEGITIMATE and HEART-RENDING ISSUES. Take the new kitten, for example. How could Mojo EVER complain about the CUTEST KITTEN EVAR? I mean, he's sitting here LEANING AGAINST MY ARM as I type! Don't "Awwww" too loud or you'll wake him up!

Honda Made Me Do This.

For the record, I am neither a particular fan (I pretty much had stopped listening to the radio by the time he made it big) nor a rabid hater. I thought Michael Bolton's version of When a Man Loves a Woman to be okay enough, but rather a copy of all previous versions. I didn't see anything all ground-breaking or awe-inspiring about it, so I didn't see what all the fuss was about. And that's about all I've heard of his music.

I'VE BEEN HACKED!!!

No, not really. I'm just practicing for that inevitable time when I might accidentally post something so egregious, so utterly offensive, that all right-thinking people, if not mortally offended, will at least have the passing thought, "Geez Mojo, what WERE you thinking?"

I believe this is how the sequence works (Mind you, I use "works" in as loose a way as you can possibly imagine):

1. Post said nasty, awful, offensive thought, joke, or nude selfie only meant for an ardent admirer (even better if they're underaged). Because let's face it, that's how Mojo rolls in the first place. (Or at least WOULD if her dang MOTHER wasn't reading this blog all the time. But I digress.)

2. Be utterly shocked when one-a them sensitive, whiny, trouble-making types somehow takes offense to your obvious genius. (Incidentally, if anyone ever criticizes you online for anything, they are CLEARLY JEALOUS. But again, I digress.)

3. Try to DEFEND said nasty, nasty thing with increasingly shrill vociferousness.

4. Somehow fail miserably, despite your shrill tone and unpleasant behavior.

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