Mojo's Favorite Mother's Sheep Collection, Volume 1
Sheep Pot Holders!
Mojo's Favorite Mother also used to collect sheep. Not anymore. At least, this is what I gather, since she has given me a huge box full of things she once collected and now wants to get rid of. When I ask her why all she says is "I'm throwing things away." Mojo likes to think that it is her own influence, simplifying her life through the Craptacular, now rubbing off on her loved ones. But there is also the nagging suspicion that her Favorite Mother has just found an excuse to send her boxes of crap. Which is it? Only time--or an irate phone call from her mother yelling at Mojo for something she said about her on the Craptacular--will tell.
Mojo will begin this particular auction by asking an important and probing question. Which, in your mind, is preferable: burning yourself on a hot pan while cooking, or subjecting some innocent little animal to the trauma of third degree burns instead? If you fall soundly on the latter side of the fence, you sick twisted freak you, then you will be particularly intrigued by this auction. It's a pair of oven mitts, cunningly crafted to look like sheep. One is white-faced, the other is slightly smaller, with a black face and a little bell on a ribbon.
They have never been used, of course, but instead lived a life of quiet abundance on a shelf in my mother's fabric room amongst a bunch of other sheep. The tags are still on one. It is identifyed as an "Anamitt" by the Peddleworks out of Shelburne Falls, MA. I don't know if both are from the same place, but they appear to be of a similar design. If you have ever been to Shelburne Falls you no doubt walked the Bridge of Flowers and then wandered the little shops and whatnot. I did that once, years ago. I was last in Shelburne Falls a little after Christmas videotaping a concert put on by a friend of mine who plays fiddle. But that's neither here nor there, is it? And it has nothing to do with sheep. Actually it does, because my friend also has sheep and her mother is a spinner and a weaver and a knitter, but that has nothing to do with THESE sheep. In fact I once posted short video clips when they had baby lambs this spring. You know, THOSE people. So if you like real baby sheepies you should see the video. But I digress.
Now, I assume that you wouldn't use REAL baby lambs to hold hot things so you don.t burn yourself. That would be the sort of person I would not wish to attract here on the Craptacular. But if you don't mind torturing poor stuffed pseudo-lambkins, I suppose these will make a nice addition to your kitchen paraphenalia or your sheep collection or your fuzzy stuffed fluffy pot holder collection. Although I am guessing you won't be actually USING them. Mojo once made the mistake of getting white pot holders for the antique kitchen wood stove she has in her kitchen. A working cast iron wood stove that needs blacking on occasion and white pot holders do not mix. It DOES mix with a gen-yoo-whine Certificate of Craptacularity that accompanies these sheepy pot holders, however. If the price of heating oil gets too high, the Certificate makes a wonderful fire starter! And if you use these little sheepy things, you won't get burned while you're burning it.....