Marilla Cuthbert, PATIENCE OF A SAINT

Everyone in the Anne of Green Gables universe is shrieking--both pro and con--about the new Netflix series based on LM Montgomery's timeless classic. I've seen the first one, and I can take it or leave it thus far. While yes, it is darker than other interpretations--and, to a point, in the at times tiresomely voyeuristic let's-dwell-on-the-beatings-a-la-Mel-Gibson sort of way that is so popular now--my main complaint has been more along the wild flights of fancy that never once appeared in the book(s) that are now appearing to flesh out the story into a multi-seasonal series. It's as if Anne herself had a hand in reintrepreting the story, and she has decided to make it as DRAMATIC and TRAGICAL as humanly possible. 

But all Anne stuff has the most welcome knife cutting through the treacle, in the personage of Marilla Cuthbert. I have tolerated Anne through the years, but I ADORE Marilla. And, to be honest, there is no getting around the late, great Colleen Dewhurst in the 1985 series to REALLY be Marilla, although the new Marilla, Geraldine James, is doing a good job of it thus far, so I can grudgingly forgive her for not being Colleen Dewhurst.

People have long told me I am too hard on Anne the character, and when I have characterized her as going "blah blah blah blah" for multiple pages before Marilla responds with a curt "shut up" I have been told I am exaggerating.

I AM NOT EXAGGERATING.

I could go on and on about it in an Anne-esque fashion, but I will limit myself to two quickly-found passages in the book, found via a three-second text search for the word tongue--used repeatedly by Marilla in variations of the phrase "hold your tongue". These are just the first two; no doubt there are MORE, but both of these are MULTI-PAGE SCREEN SHOTS that I have to PASTE TOGETHER for your amusement, and while Mojo is happy to oblige you to a certain extent bear in mind it takes VALUABLE TIME OUT OF MY LIFE. Before you accuse me of exaggerating, I suggest you read the following two passages OUT LOUD. (Right-click on the images to make them bigger, then START RECITING.)

Had enough? OH NO MOJO'S NOT LETTING YOU OFF THAT EASY:

Gadzooks, but Mojo luvs her some Marilla...

Mojo