So, Ummmm.... This Happened...

It actually happened over a year ago, but we all know how Mojo likes to ponder and contemplate Meaning and Significance before releasing her carefully-considered thoughts to the universe. She thinks it makes her look way smarter than she actually is. Plus to be honest she’s just a lazy brute who doesn’t actually WORK at anything unless her hand is forced by the prospect of something even MORE boring.

So you could blame Mojo for this obnoxious foray into an animated rage comic complete with idiotic song.... or you could blame a year’s worth of rainy days that kept Mojo from skipping about outside, which she would much rather do than stay cooped up all day moving pictures around and dwelling on some of the, uh, interesting people she has encountered in life. Such as....Creepy Toll Booth Guy.

 

For those who may suspect Mojo is exaggerating a bit, as is her occasional wont for comic effect, I’m pretty sure my Favorite Older Sister, who was the driver and hence an even closer observer to this incident than Mojo, will testify in a court of law that this did in fact happen, in every grisly detail.

I even left stuff out, for length and because it was hard to find rhymes for “failed pickup artist”. Chartist. Dartist. Fartist. It was almost as bad as “The Prince of Persuasia” from Bob’s Burgers. (It is worth watching the video clip I have linked to. Really. And remember, as you watch it, that "for 3 easy payments of $900 he can be your best friend".)

For those too lazy to sit through Mojo’s tedious song, a toll booth collector took our money and would not release our change, and just stood there for a good three or four interminable minutes, attempting lame pickup line after pickup line, trying to get us to reveal where we were going, what hotel we were staying at, etc. I kid you not.

We were on our way to a bidness meeting, and we did not have the time nor the inclination to get the authorities involved and make a big stink out of things. OTOH we were also not all that willing to abandon nearly twenty bucks in change and just leave, which may (or may not) have been a motive in his obnoxiousness. Plus we’re just too damned polite. (As least my wimpy Favorite Older Sister is; rest assured *I* would have ripped the guy a new one.) So we engaged in this literal tug-of-war with our money (believe me, I use the word "literal" in its most literal sense; he would NOT LET GO OF IT) while he kept awkwardly chatting us up. It was really uncomfortable all the way ‘round, and actually DID inspire me to buy an EZ-Pass.

What ultimately “saved” us was another car that drove up behind us. Creepy Toll Booth Guy had to let us go or have his lane clog up, which probably wouldn’t look too good on any cameras watching his booth. (I'm sure he'd just explain to his superiors that WE were hanging out trying desperately to talk to HIM, but once another car got involved he had to cruelly MAKE US LEAVE. Because, ya know, wimmins and stuff.)

Anyway, this works on so many levels, it boggles even Mojo's usually awesome, flexible, fireworky brain. Is it a cautionary tale? Is it a bold statement of society's rejection of status quo patriarchy by a third wave feminist viewpoint? Or is it just a COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME? Because rage comics are so UGLY AND STUPID! And that SONG! Don't get me started on the stupid SONG!

More pondering. Mojo needs to run out and buy some chips. This might take a while.

Mojo

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